It begins with a general observation of how untidy,
messy, lazy, and/or rude, young people are. Eventually, the detractor is likely
to conclude with, “They don’t respect their elders.”
That is a telling phrase, isn’t it? Don’t respect
their elders. It is actually code for Young people don’t respect me.”
There it is – me. Me! The cry of the ego, or at
least, the cry of an immature ego.
There are at least two mis-applied opinions within the
cry of they don’t respect their elders.
The first is that there is nothing new under the sun,
as the Ecclesiastical author tells us. In a speech to the House of Commons almost
170 years ago, a member intoned: “…the morals of children are tenfold worse
than formerly.”1
The history of older generations blaming young people
is centuries old. As far back as the 8th century BC (that’s 2,800
years ago,) Hesiod was complaining that “When I was young, we were taught to be discreet
and respectful of elders, but the present youth are exceedingly disrespectful
and impatient of restraint".2
We could turn the phrase
around and suggest that the older generation of today continue to blame and
criticise young people.
The second
misappropriation is perhaps more concerning. The misidentification with older
age as being synonymous with elderhood is a common one.3 There is
nothing to suggest that simply by attaining an age recognised (and understood)
as old can one be considered an elder.
One of the attributes
often associated with elderhood is that of wisdom. Yet, as Stephen Jenkinson disdainfully
notes,
“The proliferation of old people has not meant
the proliferation of elders… The probable reason is this: the presence of
elders in a culture turns out not to derive from an aging population. We’d be
awash in wisdom here if it did.”4
Jenkinson has possibly
thought more about, and written more fully, than any other older (and younger
for that matter) person within western culture. Rather than outline what he
thinks elderhood is, he has attempted to uncover those aspects of our modern-day
culture that have been lost, and thereby, have contributed to the loss of the
elderhood function. Jenkinson is worth quoting again,
“We have fewer elders than ever before because we
are living longer. That’s the thread I am pulling. That’s the poorly kept
secret of the age. Something about the suspension of limit and ending
compromises the function of elderhood, even the appearance of elderhood,
because there is something about limit that conjures elderhood from age.”5
Bill Plotkin too, laments
the loss of elderhood within westernised cultures. For Plotkin, a person does
not suddenly become an elder upon attaining an older age; rather and
elder appears (mostly towards the latter ages of life) because of a life-long
journey of ecological, social, spiritual, and soul-centred enquiry and
exploration, passing through a number of developmental stages along the way.
Plotkin outlines these
developmental stages in several books, and notes that a true elder “creatively
occupies their distinctive ecological niche as a life-enhancing gift to their
people and to the greater Earth community.”6
Note here that Plotkin is
referring to a much broader understanding of elderhood than is our modern-day
narrow and incomplete perception. He speaks of an ecological niche and
of gifts to the greater Earth community. The wisdom inherent in such
niches and gifts can only be acquired from a lifetime of walking a path well
clear of the highway of much of modern westernised life: a highway littered
with consumerism, environmental exploitation and destruction, violence, racism,
sexism, and anthropocentrism.
Fortunately, the role of
elderhood, and the recognition of true elders, is not completely lacking in the
world. Many indigenous and nature-based societies retain such awareness.
Peter Knutson and David
Suzuki compiled a compendium of wisdom teachings from elders of many indigenous
cultures throughout the world. In it they cite a University of Calgary lecturer
who traces her heritage within the Iroquois Confederacy:
“Native cultures fully recognise that all (older)
people have lessons to offer based on their life experiences. But they also
realise that only a few have the specialised knowledge of the cosmos that
uniquely equips them to provide wise counsel to the community and the world…
They are characterised by a deep, abiding humility, a reverence of life and the
natural world…The role of elder has traditionally been to point people toward
their rituals and growth processes that might help them become more aware of
themselves as well as of the natural world and their place within it.”7
When the insights alluded
to above are fully appreciated, it should be apparent that the claim towards elderhood
simply because of old age cannot be upheld.
It could also be inferred
from these references to elderhood that part of the elder function is to
respect the role and part of youth. Respect is a two-way street.
“The youth of today do
not respect their elders,” is a hollow claim. It is code for “Respect Me, I’m
an Elder.” I contend that such a statement is not one a true elder would make.
If anything, the statement more than likely indicates that the utterer is not
a true elder.
Notes:
1. Anthony Ashley Cooper, the
7th Earl of Shaftesbury, in speech to House of Commons on 28 February 1843.
2. Hesiod was an ancient Greek
poet who lived around the same time as Homer, between about 750 BC and 650 BC.
3. Some readers may suggest
that I am quibbling over semantics (the difference between an o at the
beginning of older and an e at the beginning of elder.)
Perhaps so, yet the difference (sometimes subtle) in words can allow us to
tease apart meaning and discover deeper, more significant, insights to arise.
4. Stephen Jenkinson, Come
Of Age: The Case for Elderhood in a Time of Trouble, North Atlantic Books,
Berkeley, California, 2018.
5. Ibid. See also his book Die
Wise, that he gives a subtle nod to in this quotation.
6. Bill Plotkin, The Journey
of Soul Initiation, New World Library, Novato, California, 2021. His other
books include: Soulcraft, Nature and the Human Soul, and Wild Mind.